ASG Live Blog: The Whole Enchilada

Yes, WHIH fans, I stayed up for the whole thing -- even here on the West Coast it was a long haul -- so if you want to read the live blog in order, here are the links:

• Red Carpet Show
• Pregame Intros
• Innings 1-3
• Innings 4-6
• Innings 7-9
• Extra Innings

Enjoy, and make it a great Wednesday!

ASG Live Blog: Extra Innings

8:50 p.m. I'd love to see this thing go 15 or so innings and have Francona leave Rivera in there to pitch the whole thing. With the Yankees going to Fenway this weekend and the way the mooks in the Bronx treated Papelbon, even Earl Hickey would give Francona a karmic pass on that one.

8:53 p.m. Sweet DP turned by the Texas Rangers middle infielders, with the Big Canadian on the back end of a 4-6-3 to bail out Mariano. Maybe Kinsler and Young will get a cookie fastball from Mo the next time they face him. Otherwise, Mo's on the hook as the losing pitcher in the last All-Star Game at Yankee Stadium.

8:57 p.m. OK, who did Dan Uggla piss off? Because that's just a sick way to get noticed on the national stage. Back-to-back errors in the 10th inning of an all-star game is not something you want to see on your baseball resume.

9:03 p.m. Uggla gets the monkey off his back a bit by getting the first out of the inning at the plate. Then Guzman makes a decent play at third, considering he's a shortstop. Now it's up to the Big Canadian ... and he can't get it done! We're going to the 11th! Uggla's career has been saved! And Bud Selig's ulcer just throbbed a little.

9:18 p.m. And once again, technology rears its ugly head as Kinsler is called out at second base on a steal attempt. Problem is, Tejada never tagged him, and the slow-mo made that painfully obvious. Even to the naked eye, you could see that Kinsler had made a great slide to the back side of the base and Tejada just swept his glove through the zone where the runner's foot is usually found. The ump relied on the old 'the ball beat him' rule and called him out ... and the band played on.

9:22 p.m. Unreal. Nate McLouth throws Dionner Navarro out at the plate. Aaron Cook has given up hit after hit after hit and yet he's still got two outs in the inning. And as it turns out, Navarro beat the tag as well -- his foot was on the plate while Russell Martin was tagging him in the crotch. But the throw beat him. And with another fine play by noted third baseman Cristian Guzman, Cook is out of another jam and we're on our way to the 12th inning.

9:31 p.m. A walk, a bunt hit, a sacrifice and an intentional walk have loaded the bases for Uggla, who really, really wishes this night would end quickly. Soria broke off one of the wickedest 12-to-6 curveballs you've ever seen to finish him off in three pitches. Here comes George Sherrill to try and get Adrian Gonzalez. The only thing I know about George Sherrill is that he told Sports Illustrated that if a movie were to be made about his life, he'd want Denzel Washington to play him. Oh, and he's white.

9:33 p.m. The worst part of extra innings? More airings of that Baby Ruth commercial. You know, the one with the giant bobblehead guy playing the ukulele and singing horribly? Yeah, that one. I'd love to hear about that ad pitch. "How can we sell more candy bars? I know -- an annoying guy with a ukulele!"

9:36 p.m. I now know this about George Sherrill -- he can strike out Gonzalez on three pitches to retire the side. I hope he's got about four more innings in him, the way this one is going.

9:40 p.m. Hey, Uggla made a play! Well, sorta. At least he got the out. The winning run is 90 feet away. Longoria just needs a fly ball. The Big Canadian is on deck. Do you get the sense that McCarver is impressed with Russell Martin? I know you were a catcher Timmy, but try to keep your gushing to a minimum. You're starting to sound like Paul McGuire describing a punter.

9:43 p.m. Longoria whiffs. Aaron Cook could wiggle out of this one again! They walk the Big Canadian to get to Kinsler. He's just the leading hitter in the American League. But he's not the Big Canadian! They didn't even try to throw out the Big Canadian at second! Defensive indifference, my ass -- they knew they had no chance! Yes, I'm getting a bit loopy by now.

9:46 p.m. Kinsler grounds out to Guzman. We're going 13. Selig looks like he just swallowed Rod Carew's chaw.

10:00 p.m. Uggla apparently is trying to win the MVP for the American League. His third error -- on a bad hop, let's all admit it -- puts Drew on first base with one out. Carlos Marmol, who gave up five runs in one inning his last time out, has been trotted out to end this thing. Buck just said that Scott Kazmir -- the last pitcher in the AL bullpen -- has sat down again after previously getting stretched out. With Sherrill already having gone 1 1/3 innings, you have to think he's done.

10:02 p.m. Drew steals second as Michael Young strikes out. One more shot for the AL, Carlos Quentin. If he can't bring home the run, we'll see if we're going to get another inning, and if so, who will throw it. Bud Selig might be dead right now, for all we know.

10:05 p.m. Quentin strikes out. It's after 1 a.m. on the East Coast. A-Rod is watching the end of the game while spooning with Madge in her townhouse. Jeter's already on his third date of the evening. Joe Buck is wondering if he gets paid by the inning.

10:10 p.m. Sherrill tosses another frame. If the Orioles were in the race, this might be an issue. As it is, Francona will probably get a nasty letter from Wild Bill Hagy. From beyond the grave, of course. It looks like Kazmir is on for the 15th. And as Buck noted, "Once Kazmir takes the mound, the clock is ticking. Maybe we can have the Hall-of-Famers pitch!" Yeah, if you can wake them up.

10:18 p.m. Brandon Webb mows down the AL in order. The Big Canadian will be leading off the bottom of the 15th! Let's see if Kazmir can throw a scoreless frame and give the Big Canadian a chance at a walk-off home run, thus giving him the HR Derby title and the All-Star MVP award in one fell swoop! Yeah, I'm getting a little loopy again.

10:28 p.m. Well, here we go! Kazmir blanked the NL in the 15th, so here comes the Big Canadian against Brad Lidge. And he leads off with a single to center! Let's see the Big Canadian swipe a bag now...

10:36 p.m. YES! I KNEW IT! The Big Canadian's wheels win it for the American League! Morneau slides in ahead of Corey Hart's throw, scoring from third on Michael Young's sac fly to give the AL a 4-3 win in 15 innings.

And despite the occasional snark or sarcasm in this blog, it was genuinely cool to see the guys all celebrating after the game. Morneau and Quentin wrapped each other in a giant hug, Youkilis jumped into the pile for some celebratory man love, and Francona got a nicotine-soaked hug from Jim Leyland.

J.D. Drew gets the Chevy MVP award from a relieved Bud Selig. A few New Yawk mooks are still around booing. And all is right in the world as the AL wins another All-Star Game. Good-night, everybody!

ASG Live Blog: Innings 7-9

7:38 p.m. The man once dubbed "Twitchy McXanax" by the late, lamented BatGirl (she's not dead -- just her blog is) takes the hill for the AL. Man, I knew Nathan was awesome, but I didn't realize that among all pitchers with at least 200 saves, he has the second-best save percentage all-time. That's ridiculous. It also explains why I feel so different when he enters the game, compared to how I felt when Eddie Guardado's High-Wire Act or even Rick Aguilera's Beard were the Twins' closers.

7:41 p.m. Josh Groban just strolled onto the field to sing "God Bless America." It says something about my interest in popular music that I asked my wife, "Who's this?" She said, "Josh Groban," and I was momentarily stunned until I realized his name was on the screen at the time. That was a pretty prissy rendition of the song, by the way. I'd rather have Ronan Tynan and his massive ears -- we're at Yankee Stadium, for crying out loud.

7:48 p.m. OK, things are starting to heat up now. Morneau just scalded a double to right and McCarver told us it was off Edinson Volquez's changeup, which has become "the pitch of the islands." He didn't specify if he meant the Canary Islands, or the Bahamas or what. Now he tells us he got it from a Wall Street Journal article. Sometimes these blogs just write themselves.

7:53 p.m. J.D. Drew just did the only thing that could earn a Boston athlete cheers from a New York crowd -- he tied the game with a two-run homer. It was a line drive to right field that was flatter than the brim on Volquez's cap. And it's a whole new ballgame.

8:03 p.m. Well, that lead lasted all of 10 minutes, as Miguel Tejada singled, stole second, moved to third on a throwing error and scored on a sac fly by Adrian Gonzalez. All of this against Jonathan Papelbon, who was just defended by the FOX broadcast crew who were truly offended by the New York Daily News story about Papelbon's comments regarding who should pitch the 9th inning tonight. Gee, you guys are surprised that a New York tabloid would manufacture a controversy involving a rival team? Fellas, the turnip truck you fell off is leaving soon ...

8:19 p.m. Evan (I'm already sick of the "Desperate Houswives" jokes) Longoria ties it back up with a ground-rule double off Billy Wagner, scoring Grady Sizemore shortly after he stole second base to get into scoring position. But the Big Canadian couldn't bloop a single to get the go-ahead run home, so we head to the 9th tied at 3.

8:35 p.m. Well, Dempster is in and this shouldn't take long. He's a good pitcher, but his home/road splits are shocking. And as we all know, tonight's game is not being played at Wrigley Field.

8:42 p.m. ... and Dempster strikes out the side to send us to extra innings. Go figure.

ASG Live Blog: Innings 4-6

6:40 p.m. Super-slow-mo just showed us that Pujols was actually safe at second, even though the throw beat him. Umpires have to hate that camera, because it exposes the old ways of calling a game. For years, if the throw beat you to the base, you were out, no matter how late the tag was. If a middle infielder was near second base on an attempted double play, the force was given. Pitchers who worked the outside corner consistently would get an extra three inches off the black, then four inches, then five inches, and so on. Technology is killing the umps and they're going to either have to embrace it to improve their performance or eventually be replaced altogether.

6:44 p.m. I can't overemphasize what a dork A-Rod looks like in those big, puffy white shoes. He looks like a high school kid who just stepped off the team bus in full uniform but wanted to put his spikes on in the dugout.

6:54 p.m. We have lift-off! Matt Holliday hammers a line drive to right for a home run off Ervin Santana. Amazingly, there are no puns on either player's name. I guess I've been watching Chris Berman for too long.

6:56 p.m. A-Rod gets taken out in the middle of an inning so the Yankees fans can applaud him. If any Yankees fans were actually at the game, that might have worked out well. Or if Yankees fans in attendance actually liked A-Rod. Or if anybody actually liked A-Rod.

7:03 p.m. Baby Jesus crushes an infield single and gets pulled for a pinch runner. It'll be interesting to see if Ian Kinsler stays in the game and they put the new catcher in Pedroia's spot, or if Francona is going to stick with his guys for nine innings. Because, you know, they're the Red Sox and they rule.

7:07 p.m. Wow, Haren just blew a fastball past Ichiro for strike three. Captain Cool is the AL's last chance this inning with two runners on and the AL trailing by a run. The "fans" just did some kind of chant for Jeter, but that lasted all of one pitch.

Buck just told us that over the last 20 games, the AL is 16-3-1. Yes, that one sticks out like A-Rod's white shoes.

And Jeter bounces back to the mound. Still 1-0. Fighting ... to ... stay ... awake.

7:15 p.m. They just showed the AL bullpen, where we were treated to a snapshot of what goes on in the bullpen in the sixth inning of a 1-0 game: Joakim Soria was picking his nose, and Mariano Rivera was yawning. We know how you feel, Mo.

7:17 p.m. I'm actually kind of surprised that we haven't seen more sponsored segments of this game. I started taking notes on the advertisers we've seen so far -- the Aquafina Make Your Body Happy Sweepstakes, the Baby Ruth Take Me Out to the Ballgame Contest, the Chevy Pregame Show, etc. -- but FOX has shown remarkable restraint during the game. Even the Foxbox isn't sponsored -- I thought for sure there would be a Vagisil or Flomax tag on there somewhere.

7:19 p.m. A Berkman sac fly puts the NL on top 2-0, and Jeter gets taken out of the game mid-inning. I sincerely hope this is just Francona pandering to the Yankee crowd in hopes of being able to get out of the stadium without being pelted with rotten fruit, and not the start of an All-Star trend where the home team's players are all given a chance to doff their lids in the middle of an inning. These things usually take long enough as it is. Even now, we're on a three-hour pace despite the lack of offense.

7:28 p.m. Mr. 28 Home Runs leads off the sixth with a single. As Jeff Spicoli might say, "All right Hamilton!"

7:33 p.m. Despite a fourth stolen base, the AL squanders another runner in scoring position and trails 2-0 after six. Somewhere, Milwaukee Brewers fans are giddy at the prospect of home-field advantage.

ASG Live Blog: Innings 1-3

5:47 p.m. Buck said, "Hanley Ramirez, if you don't know, is one of the best young players in the game," or something along those lines. Well, Joe, of course most people don't know that. It's hard to know that when every national game of the week on FOX or ESPN is either Red Sox-Yankees, Mets-Cubs, Yankees-Mets, or a Red Sox intrasquad game.

5:51 p.m. Cliff Lee strikes out two in a perfect first inning. Satan just called him in the dugout to remind him of the terms of their deal.

5:56 p.m. OK, FOX -- we know this game is in Yankee Stadium. You don't have to give us the Yankees' franchise leaders in every statistical category. Unless it's 'Most Marriages Destroyed by Over-the-Hill Pop Stars.' Then, by all means, fire away.

6:16 p.m. I've said it before, and I'll say it again: I love seeing the Twins' home white uniforms under the lights in a night game outdoors. Since 1982, the only times we get to see that are Spring Training and every other All-Star Game. 2010 can't come soon enough.

And Baby Jesus coaxes a walk. Nice to see an All-Star do what he does best. Maybe Pedroia will follow by grabbing his crotch in a shout-out to Julio Lugo.

6:33 p.m. It's been a painfully boring first three innings. McCarver just livened it up a little by saying that Ichiro is a guy who might merit Hall of Fame consideration. Gee, ya think, Tim? Your guys in the truck just posted a graphic telling us that Ichiro has had 200 hits, 100 runs, 30 stolen bases and a .300 average in each of his first SEVEN seasons in the majors.

ASG Live Blog: Pregame Intros

This was always my favorite part of the game as a kid -- because it was the one time I'd actually get to see the Twins' lone representative. For years, it was Rod Carew in the starting lineup. Then in the early 80s it got real ugly -- Doug Corbett, Dave Engle, Bombo Rivera (not really, but if fans could vote a million times over the internet like you can now, he would have made it).

Then Gary Gaetti ruined the whole thing for me. One year he writes "Hi Rex" on his batting gloves to greet Kent Hrbek back at home. The next year, he writes "Jesus Saves" on his gloves. And the world has not been the same since.

5:02 p.m. Nice to see Nate McLouth and Ryan Ludwick lined up next to each other. How do you think that conversation went? "Soak it all up, buddy -- we'll never be back here again."

5:05 p.m. Jim Leyland stopped smoking long enough to tip his cap on the baseline. I'm sure he deployed the emergency nicotine patch for the 10 minutes away from the dugout tunnel.

Joe Nathan rubbed his nose before waving to the camera. Either he was sending a signal to somebody at home, or he can't stop twitching even when he's standing still.

5:10 p.m. One local note -- just saw an ad for a contest that is sponsored by Las Vegas -- the winner gets a trip here. I find this interesting because the NFL wouldn't even allow advertisements for the NBC TV show "Vegas," let alone ads for Vegas.com or other entities. Never thought I'd see the day when MLB was more forward-thinking than the NFL.

5:13 p.m. Hall of Fame time! Man, Eckersley looks like he could still be playing. Gaylord Perry looks like he pitched to Ty Cobb. And right about now, Bert Blyleven kicked his dog.

If somebody had told you a year ago that Cliff Lee would be standing next to Steve Carlton on All-Star night, you would have thought Lee was washing his windshield.

Ooh, good. Harmon wore a Twins cap. I was afraid he might go with the Royals.

Gotta love Yankees fans -- they boo any Red Sox on cue, but after the big buildup to Whitey Ford, he got a few golf claps. I'm guessing most of these mooks have never even heard of Whitey Ford, but they could look him up on their Blackberries if they weren't so busy texting their financial advisors right now.

I get that MLB is trying to copy the NFL with their Hall-of-Fame blazers, but it's just not working. This thing looks like a Realtors convention.

A-Rod is wearing white shoes. Jeter is not. 'Nuff said.

Give Milton Bradley credit -- he didn't punch anybody on his way out to his spot on the field.

Did they forget the catchers? You have to think Joe Buck screwed that up. First he announced the managers, then the catchers, then the Hall of Fame catchers. Buck must have been distracted by a quarter somebody dropped on the press box floor.

Where's Johnny Bench? Didn't he make the Hall of Fame just on his "Baseball Bunch" career alone?

5:37 p.m. Egads! George Steinbrenner is still alive! I can't believe they're letting him out in public. I don't want to say he's slipped a bit, but I think he just tried to fire Billy Martin again.

Nice ceremonial first pitch(es), but no pregame tribute to Yankee Stadium would be complete without the ceremonial first D-cell battery toss from the upper deck in right field.

Buck just threw it to commercial with, "When we come back, we will set up this All-Star Game, the 2008 version, here in the Bronx." What the hell have we been doing for the last hour and 37 minutes?!

5:47 p.m. Oh, right. They have to have a special segment just to introduce Tim McCarver into the mix. He just compared your body's core to the core of the NL lineup in an analogy that was about as tortured as a prisoner at Gitmo. OK, there's another tortured analogy for you, but what the hell? McCarver got me into the tortured analogy spirit.

ASG Live Blog: Red Carpet Show

Hello again everybody, we're blogging live from WHIH HQ here in beautiful Henderson, Nev., where we're going to chronicle the events of the 2008 All-Star Game!

4:07 p.m. Nice to see FOX isn't going to overdramatize this event. They've just compared the "parade of heroes" to the tickertape parades that have honored V-J Day, JFK's nomination in 1960 and Queen Elizabeth's visit.

Also, I think Mark Grace is going to spend more crying than Dick Vermeil tonight.

And we have our first A-Rod sighting, as the purple-lipped one has been cornered on the red carpet by Charissa Thompson. Not sure that was the best choice by FOX -- you might not want to put him too close to random blondes these days.

Hey, there's Ryne Sandberg! Is he riding with Rafael Palmiero's wife? He who laughs last, Raffy ...

4:10 p.m. Thompson apparently has never heard of the Popemobile, as Jonathan Papelbon's surprisingly worldly reference just flew over her head like a Chuck Knoblauch throw to first.

4:30 p.m. Oh good, we have the Baby Ruth Take Me Out to the Ballgame contest winner! I was afraid FOX would have a hard time rounding up sponsors for this event.

4:35 p.m. Chipper Jones, take the dip out of your mouth when you're interviewed on national TV. Oh, and Mike Schmidt? Unless you change your last name to Ditka, spit out the chewing gum.

4:38 p.m. Breathless pimping of "The year's most anticipated series, 'Fringe'!" was followed by a snippet of Terry Francona's pregame speech. Basically, he said, "Don't get mad at me if I don't get you into the game. We can't have another embarrassing tie game, so Dionner Navarro, you might as well hang out in the clubhouse unless we play 10 innings."

4:39 p.m. I've gotta admit -- Ernie Banks holding Fukudome's kid was pretty cool. It might even help me forget Grace's attempt to speak Japanese.

4:43 p.m. Maybe it was just the lighting, but Rudy Giuliani looked like he was speaking from Dick Cheney's undisclosed bunker. Which reminds me -- I just watched Bill Maher's 'The Decider' special on HBO last week. It was taped about a year ago in Boston, and at the time, it looked like Giuliani was the odds-on pick to win the Republican nomination. A perfect example of why political humor has the shelf life of of a sushi platter.

4:55 p.m. Wait a minute -- where is this game being played? Boston? Seattle? Tampa-St. Pete? Oh yeah ... New York. Good thing they had that song to remind me.