Week 6: The negative attack parlay

My friends, the Las Vegas oddsmakers aren't bad people. Many of them are even citizens of Henderson. They're just people with whom I have fundamental disagreements over the following five games, and that's what this parlay is all about.

• Jets -6.5 vs. Bengals -- this line moved up to 8.5 by Friday with the news that Carson Palmer wouldn't play, but it was still 6.5 on the card so I jumped on it.
• 49ers +5.5 vs. Eagles -- Niners lost at home last week to Pats and I don't expect two in a row against a Westbrook-less Eagles team.
• Lions-Vikings under 45.5 -- Have you watched either of these offenses? Unless we see four special teams/defense touchdowns, this thing's going way under.
• Cowboys-Cardinals over 50.5 -- I liked the over even before I heard that Dallas might be without its two starting cornerbacks.
• Packers-Seahawks under 46.5 -- No Hasselbeck, no receivers, no Seattle offense. But the vaunted 12th man at Qwest Field will give the Packers fits, keeping the total down.

Last week: 3-2
Season: 10-14-1